Someone Always Get Left Behind…….

This has always been a problem at every funeral home I have worked at.  For what ever the reason, someone always gets left behind.

The idea of unclaimed cremains is a problem for funeral homes now and will continue to be a problem in the future. As the cremation rate climbs so will funeral homes frustration that cremains are being forgotten at an alarming rate. The other problem is that funeral homes are really not sure what they should do and how they should legally handle the situation.


Legally, the cremains are the property of who ever signed the contract.  The deceased  are no longer a “person. ” Cremains have to be treated differently. As far as the government goes, the cremation is the end of the line. Final disposition is the address of the crematory. If the cremains are interred later, according to your death certificate,  your place of final disposition was 101 Crematory Lane not Happy-view Cemetery where the cremains were interred. For some people this is a problem.

I digress. As a funeral director I saw this problem at every funeral home I worked for. Here is an article which sheds some light on what funeral homes are trying to do to solve the problem. The funeral homes listed in the article provided the local paper with a list of names of unclaimed cremains with the hopes that someone will recognize a name on the list and contact the funeral home. Cardboard-box

There are a million reasons why cremains are not picked up. With the cremation rate rising this is going to continue to be a problem. Funeral homes are going to have to contact families immediately after the cremation is completed. It would be in everyone advantage if the two party’s stay actively connected until the cremains are claimed.

As always, if you have a question don’t hesitate to call (802) 353-0021 or email me directly at

Also, I will be speaking at the Putney Library on November 17, 2014 at 7 pm.  The talk is being sponsored by The Death Group of Putney.

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Things Could Get Freaky………….


In the wake of the news on Ebola and Enterovirus 68, it seems everyone is preparing for the worst. The CDC says that things could get freaky if we don’t take these viruses seriously. Being very susceptible to the virus, funeral personnel need to take special precautions.  The CDC has released some addition procedures for handling the deceased.

“These recommendations give guidance on the safe handling of human remains that may contain Ebola virus and are for use by personnel who perform postmortem care in U.S. hospitals and mortuaries. In patients who die of Ebola virus infection, virus can be detected throughout the body. Ebola virus can be transmitted in postmortem care settings by laceration and puncture with contaminated instruments used during postmortem care, through direct handling of human remains without appropriate personal protective equipment, and through splashes of blood or other body fluids (e.g. urine, saliva, feces) to unprotected mucosa (e.g., eyes, nose, or mouth) which occur during postmortem care. Only personnel trained in handling infected human remains, and wearing PPE, should touch, or move, any Ebola-infected remains. Handling of human remains should be kept to a minimum. Autopsies on patients who die of Ebola should be avoided. If an autopsy is necessary, the state health department and CDC should be consulted regarding additional precautions.”

The complete article can be seen here.


The article has lots of information that most funeral directors use and practice everyday.  As for someone dealing with a family member who has any contagious disease, this is important information.  I want to bring this up to inform families caring for their own dead about risks brought about by these and other contagious viruses. My advice is take every precaution to protect yourself.  You can never be too cautious. If you might be in this situation, please do some homework to protect yourself and your family.

The funeral industry has dealt with similar situations before: AIDS, HIV, Hepatitis, Creutzfeldt–Jakob disease, and most recently MRSA. All of the directors I know are aware of the risks, have the right equipment and the knowledge to handle anything. Someone who is not in the business, and might not have the knowledge,  may want to get professional to help.

When choosing help in a situation like this, start with your LOCAL funeral home. Not sure if your funeral home is local?  Ask.  As always you can call me at (802)353-0021.


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Filed under At home Services, ebola, Funeral Adviser, Funeral Consultant, Funeral Expert, low cost cremations, Personal Protective Equipment, Personalized service, Pre Arrangements, Veterans

Upcoming Events

Just want to take a minute to thank everyone who has let me help them with end of life options. In the last 5 months we have talked to 100’s of people in the Southern Vermont and New Hampshire. It has also been nice to know that people as far away as California asked for our help.

This is also a good time to let the local area know that I am speaking at a death workshop at Emmanuel Retreat Center, Church St.  Bellows Falls, VT.  The program is a all day event. Lunch will be served. The program starts at 10am on November 22, 2014. Preparing for the Inevitable will be a informational look at end of life. The minister from the church and myself will look at a number of issues. More on that in the up coming months.

Thank you again for letting me help your family with the information you need, when you need it most. As always, 802 353-0021 if you need my help.



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Irish Sporting Page……….

I have been following the obituary page a little here and there as of late.  As a funeral director I use to look daily. I would look  to see if someone we knew had died and gone to another funeral home. Funeral homes live and die by the “Irish sporting page.”  The funeral home would count the obits and keep track of where all of the calls went. This is by no means an accurate way to track a local market.  As a funeral consultant I noticed a few trends that I want to comment on.


1. Obits written by a family, without mention of a funeral home, seem to far out way the traditional obit with a funeral home tag at the bottom. A lack of tagging by a funeral homes means a funeral home probably had nothing to do with the services.   It is evident that more families are making their own arrangements without a funeral homes involvement.

2. The tags from funeral homes are getting bigger and more elaborate. Corporate funeral homes always have the biggest. It bothers me that family owned businesses try to emulate the corporate funeral homes as far as logos go. I find them tacky and an expense the family does not need.  Oh by the way, YOU are paying for the logo to be displayed at the bottom of your loved ones obit.

3. Obits written by funeral homes are the most boring, stale, insipid, uninspiring bits of opus I have ever seen.  I to am guilty of penning my fair share of space filler on the obit page. Trust me, I wasnt trained that way, it just kinda happens after doing the same thing over and over again. I always enjoyed a family that came to the arrangements with a rough draft or better yet, an obit written by the decided.  The obits that are written by the family have character.  They tell the story.

obituary newspaper section illustration design

Over all it is nice to see that families are taking back end of life services.  Families that I have talked to are finding it very healing to be active in the process.




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The Uncomfortably Slow Death of SCI in Vermont……

Another ad on the front page, another pathetic attempt to save a dying corporate funeral business. The Brattleboro Reformer has another sticker add-on the front page of their paper advertising  a “complete traditional funeral” for $4,695*.  For someone who knows very little about funeral service, this looks like a great “deal”. I can tell you from experience this is not the deal you are looking for.IMG_2932

Working as a advocate  for the funeral consumer, I have spent a lot of time collecting general price lists from all of my local funeral homes. Some are a page long, others are 15 pages. All 5 of the 15 pagers come from the same corporate funeral homes. All 5 of them are very similar in verbiage and price. The difference between those 5 and the rest of the states funeral homes is defiantly price.

The sticker on the Reformer has a list on the back gives a list of what you are getting for $4,695.  As someone who has planned thousands of funerals, I can vouch that the list is complete. Cash advances are never included and are always added to the final total. When market share or averages were dropping, price slashing was the first step. When I worked for the corporations they would never include a casket or a liner in a sale, unless things were desperate. Now mind you the casket included is cardboard cloth-covered.  Not for everyone, but meets the requirement. The liner is a requirement of the cemetery and the cost is minimal to the funeral home. The reasoning behind offering the least attractive casket or liner  is to entice the family to op out of the packaged merchandise for a more expensive models.

The corporate funeral homes will charge a family 5-6 times the price they paid for that casket and liner.  When you take a look at the price list for the corporate funeral businesses and total same services at full prices, you come up with a $9000 +/-  funeral.  Thats a 45% savings. That is roughly a 5 thousand dollar difference.  I don’t know any local businesses who could offer that percentage of saving and stay afloat for very long.  Not any local family businesses could offer that much of a discount and still break even.liner

As a corporate funeral home they have the ability to lower prices when they want with little affect to the corporation as a whole. As the corporate funeral homes continue to struggle in Vermont they will continue to do what ever they can to survive. The word from the funeral industry and a handfull of directors from Vermont is they would do anything to unload all of there Vermont holdings. This might be a good reason why they are having informational seminars and lunches at the local American Legion or Holiday Inn. Sticker ads on the front of papers reaks of desperation.sleezy

After I saw the first sticker add, I kept my eye open for more.  Ker Westerlund has been publishing these a couple of times a week for the last few weeks. I also noticed that the days when Ker Westerlund was not advertising there were advertisements by a number of  local businesses. There was the ad by the car dealership advertising lowest prices of the season. The ad says “no body can beat our deals.” They listed at least 10 cars on the back of the sticker at crazy low prices. I saw a sticker add for a woman’s clothes store who was going out of business and everything had to go. 

I would like to say that one of these ads is not like the other.  But it is so not true.


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See Reverse for Details……..




It looks like the corporate funeral home is in the media again. This time it is not about mass graves in TX. It is not about there habitual practice of overcharging and taking advantage of the grieving. This time they paided for it, and its on the front page.

On the front page of the Weekend Reformer, Ker-Westerlund funeral home has placed a sticker on the paper asking you to talk to them about a 4,695 dollar burial. That seems to be a little different than their national average that hovers around $10,000. Another interesting point is the fact that this go around with the free luncheon and free information, they are still not using there corporate logo.   I blogged about this a few months ago and you can see the difference in the adds. The older add was at least on the front page, the new add is a sticker that has information on both sides. If your selling cars, or offering a rebate on batteries the sticker thingy might work, for funerals, not so much.


As a past manager for corporate funeral homes, these meetings are lead generators for the pre need sales people. It also shows that the corporation is losing market share in the area. The last informational talk they had was a few months ago. It was held at the Legion in Brattleboro. They promised along with lunch you would get all the information you needed on green burials.  I have heard that they could of saved some money by holding it in a phone both. The most recent add offers 2 luncheons. One in August and one in September.  These are set up for your convenience.  If you miss the first one they want to make sure you can join them for next. When an area or region of a corporate funeral company starts to tank, the lunches usually follow. If the company continues to lose market share the next step is buying up the competition.

If you cant beat em, buy em. This is the motes operand i of any corporate funeral company who is losing ground in a area. In Vermont there is still some opportunity for corporate growth. When you think about the locations they own now, some of the surrounding funeral homes are ripe for the picking. The money offered by the corporations is always better than good.  They pay with cash and they keep on the employees for a seamless transition. Money is king but as a funeral director I was looking to help folks. I found the hardest part was asking for money which alot of folks didn’t have.  Maybe my view is skewed.  The fact that a funeral director would sell out to a conglomerate, knowing what all of us know, is ludicrous.  Hard to believe the almighty buck outways the years of service to a community.

Local family run funeral homes are disappearing rapidly. The corporations realize if they buy groups of funeral homes in the same area, they can charge what they want. Talk to your local funeral director, ask if they are local and if they are going to stay that way. Back to the informational luncheons offered by Ker-Westerlund in Brattleboro, save your time, save some aggravation and talk to your local funeral director about anything funeral related.river pic

You can always call me and I can lend a hand.  (802) 353-0021

WRS LOGO 2013 image (2)



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Sign z papers……….

bad-salesman-31It seem that the VT corporate funeral company is at it again. I found a flyer in the coffee house that was announcing a “funeral workshop” at the Holiday Inn Express in Brattleboro. I have said it before and I will say it again, on August 19th and September 23, take some time to clean your sock draw or sort your holy cards. Do anything but attend a corporate funeral event.

I have blogged about this in the past.  These “‘informational meeting” always are nothing more than pre need sales opportunities.  They will give you all the information you need to pre pay a funeral by putting your money in a non refundable funeral account. The only people who are getting anything out of this meeting is the corporation. Once they get your address and phone number they will chase you down to try and sell you a funeral. Pre paying a funeral is a no win situation for you or your loved one.

Dont be fooled. Save your self a lot of time and months of annoying phone calls and letters.  Stay home on August 19 and September 24. Do not support corporate funeral homes. Shop local, buy local, be local.

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