Tag Archives: prearrangements

February 9, 2013 · 7:01 pm

Time to take the stroll…….

As we get close to Valentine’s Day, I hope that everyone remembers the importance of shopping local. Instead of ordering that book of poetry from Amazon, instead of ordering flowers from an email promotion, instead of driving to Rutland to go to a big-name jeweler, go for a stroll downtown and shop at our friend’s and neighbor’s establishments.
We have all done it a million times. It is so easy to click on this or click on that and get 2 or 3 day delivery. Before the phone or internet, you were forced to take the stroll downtown in order to get a special gift. You could get most everything you needed – when you needed it. Not only were you doing what you had to, you were also supporting your community.
Downtown Chester Vermont is beautiful right now, with a fresh covering of snow, thanks to Nemo. As I typed this yesterday, it snowed and sleeted most of the day.  The Weather Channel said the worst is yet to come for those along the coast. Chester is “Anytown USA.” No matter how much more we get here, Chester will be open for shopping on Monday morning.
Where ever you live, you should be supporting your local businesses. Shop local and support your community. Valentine’s Day is a perfect time to start a “shop local” tradition. Chester, just like your town, has everything you will need to make this a great “local” Valentine’s Day: poetry books, chocolate, flowers, jewelry… Support your friends, neighbors and fellow business owners. Shop local.
Williams River Services is the only locally-owned funeral establishments.  In Chester, we have two funeral businesses.  One is owned by a huge conglomerate; the other is owned and operated by myself. If you live in other areas of the country and are not sure who owns your local funeral establishment, ask.  The largest corporate funeral company has been nice enough to make a list of their funeral homes who are not locally owned: http://www.sci-corp.com/SCICORP/FindLocalProvider.aspx?alias=0201
The BackyardYes, I’m shameless… every chance I get, I want to remind you to shop local. Know who you are doing business with. Buy Valentine’s gifts for your loved one or care for them in their last days and in death with the help of your local community businesses.

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June 28, 2012 · 1:51 am

60 minutes again……

A few weeks ago there was a 60 minutes piece on cemeteries that didn’t play by the rules.  The story turned ugly and SCI, owner of the cemetery, once again took a well-deserved beating. Well this looks like another interview about pre paying for funeral goods and services and or your plot.

Josh Slocum from Funeral Consumer Alliance was asked about pre paying for just those things. “I cannot and will not tell a consumer to pre pay for anything.” He adds, ”AARP and Consumer Reports agree. This is standard advice from people who have no interest in selling you anything.”

My advice has always been the same. Make sure someone know what you want for arrangements. Going to pre plan services is fine. DO NOT PRE PAY! If you do have to pre pay (tax reasons, spend downs, etc) do so with your local bank.  Shop your local funeral providers and take your time making your decisions. The bank will help you set up an account which you will control.

The video is below.  Enjoy.

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7409170n

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Filed under At home Services, Cremations, home funeral, low cost cremations, Pre Arrangements, Veterans

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May 21, 2012 · 1:39 pm

You’re so vain. You probably think this May Press Release is about you.

for immediate release:

Williams River Cremation Services has been in business for only a short time, but they have made a huge impression with new services for end of life issues. Services are modeled around those of two hundred years ago. Back then, after the family had washed and dressed the deceased, they would call the undertaker who then assisted the family with anything needed to plan a meaningful service in their home or other location. If you think the funeral industry only can offer a 2 o’clock funeral, think again.

In September of 2011, Mark J. Kenney formed WRCS.  Since then he has served families from Brattleboro to White River Junction. Unlike any other end of life services in Vermont, WRCS has no formal funeral facility. Families who choose WRCS often celebrate where they are comfortable. Kenney meets his families in their homes to make arrangements. “This takes a lot of pressure off the families. Folks don’t want services in an outdated facility; and they don’t want to make arrangements there either. The best decisions are made when and where they are most comfortable.”

Families no longer have to deal with the cost of a funeral home for full service cremation or burial. “I have worked in a funeral home, here in Vermont, for 12 years. It’s tough to watch the prices go up. The best way to make it more affordable is to keep it local; being able to offer affordable services are a must in today’s economy.” He continues: “We have been able to assist some families in tough economic situations. WRCS has allowed me make cremation or burial personalized, respectful and affordable.”

Kenney, a Licensed Funeral Director/Embalmer knew this would be a different business model. “The state and I were at first unsure about how we were going to proceed. After things got rolling, we knew we were on to something that would change mortuary services in Southern VT.” Speaking of the cost issue Kenney said “Funeral homes have to charge you for the building and other overhead costs. Those charges are added to the bill whether you use the facilities or not. ”

For the families that want some involvement in cremation, WRCS offers the one of the lowest priced direct cremation in Vermont. “I am very proud to be able to offer this.” Kenney said. “The lack of overhead allows us to pass savings along to our families.”

Veterans and their spouses receive a 10% discount. Kenney, a veteran himself says it’s the least he can do for his brothers in the Armed Forces.

WRCS has taken the lead in Green Services in Southern VT, offering a selection of eco-friendly services and merchandise. “WRCS is proud to offer local products created by local artisans. Products which are not supplied locally are chosen for their quality and cost.”

Not many of us want to think about our mortality. Kenney wants people to feel comfortable talking about the subject. Using social media, an informational blog and website, WRCS is a resource for people to think about end of life issues in new ways.

WRCS is filling a important niche in the death care industry. The idea of green burials, home services, and supporting other local businesses were common practice 200 years ago.  It is nice to know that companies like WRCS continue to find new innovative ways to support the local economy, control cost, and educate consumers on all things end of life.

WRCS is located in Chester VT.  Please contact Mark J Kenney at 802 374-0172. http://www.williamsriverservices.com   mark@williamsriverservices.com

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Filed under Cremations, Experience, General Information, Green Burials, home funeral, Hospice, low cost cremations, Memorial services, Veterans, Veterans Benefits

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November 9, 2011 · 4:41 pm

Home Funerals, Green Burials: Getting the story straight.

After spending a few minutes online, I found good information on Green Burials and Home Funerals.  You might be surprised by some of the information.

First, I would like to share this short FOX news story that highlights green burials: Introducing Green Burials  When Dad died, the family wanted to have “something positive come out of a bad situation” and they chose to have a green thinking funeral home help them with their arrangements.  The funeral home got it right: biodegradable casket, family involvement, low prices.  Most funeral homes will not help a family with this type of arrangement because it affects their bottom line.  It is good to see news stories like this because green thinking is important, even in the funeral industry, and families should know their options.

There are two organizations that I have found very helpful on procedures and family involvement: Home Funeral Alliance and Home Funeral.  Both sites give valuable information and advice to someone interested in home funeral services.

Adding to this, I wanted to answer some myths I have encountered:

  • Home funerals have to happen at your home.  Not true.  Most people have modest homes that would not be large enough to comfortably host family and friends. Churches, civic halls, fraternal organization are all large enough to supply a room that would be comfortable for a family.  A small donation is a nice gesture; it helps you with your service and helps them pay the bills.  Donations could be $100-$200 dollars.
  • The family has to help with preparation of the body.  Not true.  The great thing about home funerals is you get to decide what you are comfortable with.  A hundred years ago families did all the preparation in the home before a funeral director was called. Washing your loved one and dressing them in their favorite clothes is extremely comforting to some families.  But this doesn’t need to be a requirement of a home funeral.
  • It’s illegal to keep a deceased love one at home after they die.  Not true.  Most funeral directors want you to believe that the body must be moved to their facility as soon as possible. In extreme cases this might be true, but most times it is not. This myth is usually followed by “the body must be embalmed”.   Your loved one may be able to remain at home a short while, until a close family member can arrive.
  • Only a traditional funeral home can help with a home funeral. Not true. There are hundreds of home funeral organizations that can answer your questions and point you in the right direction. The web sites I shared above have lists by state on who can help your family. WRCS is one of many services which will help guide the family though the process.

This is not about cost. This is about taking back one of the most meaningful things you and your family can do for a loved one. Families that choose home funerals prefer personalization over commercialized funeral practices. Like home births and home schooling, home funerals offer people a measure of control and allow you to go at your own pace. The fact that a family can save thousands of dollars, help the environment, and possibly make the grief process a little smoother are all bonuses. If you’d like to discuss Green Burials or Home Funerals, please be in touch at any time.

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November 1, 2011 · 2:14 pm

Funeral etiquette and common sense.

There is nothing more uncomfortable than attending a funeral and not being sure what to do or say.  There are a lot of articles written on the subject on the internet; I have found some very good resources. But, just like anything else on the internet, there is some really bad advice.
I would like to share some thoughts with you and give you my own perspective on what I have seen over the years.
Sue Fox wrote an article that I included below.  This is the short version but still holds a lot of valuable information.
What to Do, Say, and Wear at Funerals
Going to funerals or memorial services can be uncomfortable for some people because of the emotions involved. Knowing what to do and say at funerals — and what to wear — can ease the discomfort.
When in doubt about going, do try to attend the service. Generally, the more difficult the situation, the more the family will appreciate your presence and your words of support. Your willingness to go out of your way to say a word or two of comfort will be very much appreciated.
These services provide a sense of completion, a process for mourning, and comfort for the living. The outpouring of grief and support for the family enables them to eventually go on with their own lives.
Attending a funeral or memorial service
In many cultures, the first event that follows a death is a visitation, calling, or wake — a courtesy call at the funeral home prior to the funeral. The casket is present (open or closed), with flowers on display, and the family receives visitors who come to greet them and offer words of comfort and support.
A funeral or memorial service may be a very public event, attended by family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, and even acquaintances. A eulogy, prayers, or other funeral customs are observed. Because the immediate family may be overwhelmed, you need only to greet the mourners and briefly offer condolences. Most important for the family is the knowledge of your presence. (If the service is private, those attending will be notified personally, usually by telephone.)
Burials usually follow funerals. Some cultures consider it a sign of respect to deposit a ceremonial shovel of earth into the grave. This ceremony is initiated by a member of the family and followed by others. If you were close to the deceased, you may take your turn.
In almost all cultures, taking a meal in the company of close friends and family is a symbol of the continuation of life and a moment of separation from the intense details of the death, funeral, and burial. Recalling fond memories of the deceased may inspire smiles and even laughter at this gathering — this behavior is perfectly acceptable.
Expressing condolences at a funeral
Most people are at a loss for words when it comes to comforting someone who is grieving. If you don’t know what to say, start with these thoughts:
  • You’re so sorry to hear this sad news.
  • The deceased will be sorely missed by friends and colleagues.
  • How much you loved this person and how bereaved you feel.
  • You know how much the deceased loved and cared for the people who are left behind.
  • The grief you feel for the person who is left behind.
  • What a wonderful person the deceased was.
Recounting anecdotes, warm remembrances, and stories about the deceased is a kind thing to do. Remembering the person’s accomplishments and all that person meant to you and did for you, and sharing that with the family, is very important and much appreciated.
The etiquette of consoling a dear one is the etiquette of genuine affection. Do what you can to comfort and assist the survivors, and be alert for an indication that your attentions have been gratefully received and are no longer necessary. Sometimes people need to work things out for themselves.
What to wear to a funeral
In Western society, black has long been the traditional color for mourning. However, wearing black isn’t required any longer. Wearing a color other than black isn’t a sign of disrespect, as long as the color isn’t bright or wildly patterned. In many cultures, red is a color for festivals and would be inappropriate for a funeral. Generally, play it safe with any dark or subdued color. Hats may be worn by women, and at Orthodox Jewish services, yarmulkes are worn by the men. Dark suits and ties for men and dresses or suits for women are always appropriate.
Some religions impose strict standards of modesty on women. When in doubt, ask someone or do an Internet search. If you don’t know whom to ask, make sure that the only skin you display at a funeral is from the neck up and the knees down.

Services and customs vary greatly by area.  A funeral here in Vermont will be much less formal than a service in Boston. I have always felt that attending the funeral, regardless of dress, is the most important thing you can do. It is very comforting for a family to know that you made the effort to be there.
I can promise you that the family would love to hear any comforting words you have to offer.  A simple “I am so sorry for your loss” goes a long way.  If you did not know the family personally, this is your opportunity to let them know who you are and what your relationship was with the deceased.
Pictures are captured moments in time. The picture of you and the deceased fishing on Lake St. Katherine in the summer of 2009 is one you will always cherish. They family probably knew that he had gone to Lake St. Katherine but knew little more.  You have a picture in your hand of one of your memories that they have never seen.  Share it.  They will love the opportunity to see that familiar smile one more time and take comfort that you took the time to share it.
Common sense goes a long way here.  There is a good chance that this is also the family’s first experience at a service for a loved one. Be yourself, be kind, and be there for the family.

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October 1, 2011 · 10:53 pm

Prearrangements and prepaying – what’s the difference?


After opening the doors of WRCS, one of the most common questions I have heard is about prearranging and prepaying your funeral.  If you look at the internet for answers, you probably still don’t have a clue if you should or should not.  Depending on who you talk to, the advice is endless.  In today’s Blog, I will throw my experience, and advice, into the ring.

Prearranging and pre-paying funerals are two different things. There, I said it.

I have always been a fan of prearranging your funeral. You will be able to make choices that are meaningful to both you and your family; you will gain peace of mind knowing your family and friends will be relieved of the emotional and financial burden often associated with making arrangements when a death occurs. Many times families have not yet talked about funeral choices. It is nice for the funeral home to tell the family that dad came in five years ago and made his plans.

Much to the chagrin of my former employer, I am not a fan of prepaying your funeral.

Let me explain.  Prearranging a funeral is the act of sitting down with your local area provider and putting on paper your final wishes. Prepaying a funeral is an additional step in making final arrangements. They are asking you to pay, upfront, for your funeral, either by making a lump payment or making partial payments prior to death. You will be told that this will “freeze” the cost of the merchandise, making things easier on your family at the time of death.

Think about it. Why would a funeral home want you to “freeze” the cost of merchandise and services years in advance? What is the benefit for them? Well, for starters, those owned by corporations use it as a way to report revenue and volume, which sounds terrific to shareholders on the quarterly conference calls. Also, there is a thing called interest.

After being in the business for 20 years, I have seen people who have benefited and people who have been burned with the prepaying option.  The idea of “selling” preneed was pioneered by the large corporations.  The more money they take in, the better it looks to the board of directors.  The corporation cannot access these funds until the death has occurred. They do consider it “money in the bank” which they will get when the holders pass. The federal government has specific rules on where money can be kept and how it will be handled. These funds cannot be touched until the death is certified by death certificate.

The funds are placed into an account, which draws interest. However, every penny of interest goes to the funeral home at the time of death. You would be told that the interest is minute, allowing them to cover only a fraction of what the funeral would really cost in the future. Think about that. Again, why would they try to sell preneeds and lose money? Is the interest really minute? The corporations will demonstrate on your at-need contract, just how much your loved one saved you by prearranging the funeral.

It seems to me that there is some creative accounting going on. The corporate titans have learned how to manipulate the numbers. In cases where the prearrangement actually is worth more than a current funeral (and it is possible in many circumstances), the numbers are manipulated to show otherwise.

Some corporate homes tell you that your arrangements are transferable. I can assure you, from my experience in the business, nothing is farther from the truth. When they say transferable, they mean within their own company.  Every corporate location has different pricing structures, causing more confusion. I have personally witnessed folks being turned down when asked about such transfers.

Also, I have heard sales people state that “everything is included and covered.” This too, is far from reality.  Often, additional costs can be added, even when prepaying for your arrangement.

I can sincerely say that being aware of this, I have done things differently. I have never made prearrangements with a family that were not 100% transferable. I have always given whatever is left in the burial account back to the family.  This was not the policy of my employer but I felt to be a true benefit to prepaying for your arrangements. Trust me, there were times when the family was on the winning side of prepaying, but this was not the norm.

This is my advice:

  1. Do not make arrangements with a corporate funeral organization. If you are not sure about your local funeral provider, ask them.
  2. Do not make arrangements that are irrevocable.
  3. Do not sign anything until a lawyer has looked at the documents.
  4. Ask for a specific list of what is included.  Also ask for a list of what is NOT included.
  5. Make sure someone in your family knows about the arrangements and has them on hand when needed.
  6. Work with a local bank to set up a burial account.  It is your money and some funeral homes are not looking out for your best interest.

I don’t want to discourage anyone from starting to talk about their wishes when a death occurs. I always tell families I speak with that a local bank can help you with a burial account.  After you have your prearrangements, talk with your local banker. That additional piece of mind – that your funds are secure and local – has always made sense to me.

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